I BROKE UP WITH BOOZE - AND WANT TO HELP YOU DO THE SAME
My alcohol use was societally acceptable - but it was holding me back.
It started when I was 16. The first time I drank, I blacked out at a party and threw up in my front yard. I told my mom I must've gotten food poisoning. I learned early on to appear coherent even when I was not. The fact that I was rarely "sloppy" or a "bad drunk" made it seem like I didn't have a problem.
Fast forward 20 years, and I had continued to justify my drinking because it's just what WE do. "Mommy needs wine" and "it's 5 o'clock somewhere." And it's not a problem if you still check the boxes of a functioning adult, right?
I didn't realize how deeply engrained drinking was in our culture until I decided to stop.
And this picture? This is part of a branding shoot I did a year ago back when I was a "wine dealer." If I can kick booze to the curb, I know you can if you decide to!
WHAT WOKE ME UP
I knew I had to change before my drinking caught up to me.
The epiphany came when my liver woke me up at 3am on the morning of June 13, 2022.
Has this ever happened to you?
One of the reasons is because 3am is when your body's meridian clock has finished cleansing your liver. I was wide awake and hungover, full of shame for having gotten so drunk on what was supposed to be a laidback Sunday.
At 3am, I decided to Google "high functioning alcoholism" and this popped up. I felt like I was reading about myself. Below, I'm excerpting some of the key lines from the WebMD article.
This quote from it hit me like a Mack truck:
"But [she] isn’t doing fine, says Robert Huebner, PhD, of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. No one, he warns, 'can drink heavily and maintain major responsibilities over long periods of time. If someone drinks heavily, it is going to catch up with them.'”
Ask yourself now - have you used any of the justifications below to rationalize why your drinking isn't a problem?
You have a great “outside life,” with a job that pays well, home, family, friendships, and social bonds
You might be responsible and productive. You could even be a high achiever or in a position of power. In fact, your success might lead people to overlook your drinking.
You might make excuses like, “I only drink expensive wine” or “I haven’t lost everything or suffered setbacks because of drinking.”
Your friends, family and/or partner drink like you do, too. It's "normal."
If you answered yes to any of these, I get it. I was there too. Because I was far removed from drinking out of a brown paper bag or living under a bridge, I couldn't possibly have a problem... right?
READ THIS BEFORE YOU GO ANY FURTHER.
Aside from a transformational life coach certification, I have absolutely no expertise, training or certification that qualifies me to help you or anyone else quit drinking or overcome addiction.
My only qualification is my own lived experience and what has helped me to be alcohol free since June 13, 2022.
If my narrow window of human experience isn't broad enough to help you on your individual journey, know that I will provide you with the outside resources I'm aware of. I will walk with you to the furthest extent of my ability.
If you're still interested in being part of this community despite my complete lack of credentials - amazing! Below is what worked for me and how you can take part.
But if you're honest - you know that alcohol is standing in the way of you becoming the best and highest version of yourself.
And I want to help you BECOME HER.
HOW I QUIT - AND HOW MAYBE YOU CAN, TOO.
Identify your WHY, the patterns you're stuck in, and leverage community.
Know your why.
My daughter turns 4 in November. I know that more is caught than taught. My primary why is HER - and her future. Not only do I want her to cultivate healthy habits, but I want to be present, healthy, and alive for as much of her lifetime as I possibly can.
Do you drink out of FOMO? Do you want to drink because you're in a place where you're used to drinking? Do you love the ritual of opening a cold drink to relax?
All of these patterns were ones I had. Through intentionality and awareness, I was able to create NEW patterns that allowed me to keep the events and rituals I enjoy, without the booze.
Community is key.
Drinking is so engrained that you probably think you'll lose all your friends and have no life if you quit. Right? That's where community comes in. A BIG reason I was able to kick it is because I met and witnessed many women I admire not drink. I still thought they were cool - and I realized how flawed my perception had been.
Beginning on August 15, 2022:
A space to co-create with others becoming the best versions of themselves; to share your triumphs, struggles, ideas and inspiration; and to know you are never alone on your journey to your best life ever.
Slack community access
Weekly community calls
Tips for sustainable healthy habits
Daily learning and inspiration
Recommendations for non-alcoholic beverages
Resources and support
Starting a community for other sober curious women is something that was placed on my heart and that I feel called to do out of service and love.
To do this is my gift to you.
My only ask? Will you donate $30 (or $1 a day) to an organization aiding those in recovery, To Write Love on Her Arms?
Can't donate $30? Give whatever you can. 🤍
You can learn more about TWLOHA and donate here.
Free 30 Day Accountability Group
Groups not your thing (yet)?
I understand if you're not ready to be public in your journey yet. It took me a while. But I've got something for you at your stage, too.
Each day in the community, I'll be sharing information that will arm you with knowledge, inspiration, or both. Want to get a daily email with that info until you're ready to join the group?
How much the alcohol addiction rate among women rose between 2002 and 2012.
(As in, it nearly doubled.)
Why this matters NOW
Source: Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Drinking by Holly Whitaker